Love is a fickle thing.
It’s not the easiest to figure out, and yet it’s one of the ultimate end goals of a typical human life – to find the right soulmate to settle down. After deciding to make a long-term commitment to a partner you’re somewhat sure is your soulmate, you might start to have this fear:
What if they’re cheating on me?
You don’t want to waste your love and effort on someone who doesn’t even love you and is, in fact, seeing someone else.
Well, Dr Goody Feed is here to help.
1. They Don’t Introduce You To Their Friends & Family
“Dear, when are you gonna bring me home for a dinner ah?”
“Uh… next time ah, they in Ethiopia helping children/China feeding homeless/North Pole fighting Santa Claus now.”
And then you see them eating chicken rice together in the market two days later.
If they have excuses after excuses to prevent you from meeting their family and close friends, they probably don’t want them to see someone who’s only going to be around temporarily.
Worse still, it’s because their friends and family know someone else to be their boyfriend/girlfriend.
2. Their Friends Are Uncomfortable Around You
Okay, but what if they do introduce you to their friends?
You’re still not quite safe yet. There’s one more check to do – are they comfortable and open around you?
If his/her friends are somewhat anxious and uncomfortable around you, they might know something you don’t.
3. They’re Overly Secretive On Their Phone/Computer
Okay, everyone likes some privacy on their phone and computer usage.
But what if they’re overly secretive? Like you take their phone for fun and they punch your face and slap the phone out of your hand?
They probably have something to hide.
But don’t be alarmed if your boyfriend hides/cleans his Internet browser history though. That’s entirely normal behaviour.
4. They’re Unreachable Sometimes Without Good Reason
Well, if they’re cheating, they probably will be spending a significant amount of time with their cheating partner.
Have you ever had times when your partner was unreachable without good reason?
Key phrase to stop yourself from being paranoid – “without good reason”. Your boyfriend being unreachable after going outfield is perfectly normal.
“Eh, brb, I go feed my goldfish.”
*disappears for 4 hours*
“Okay I’m back, phew that felt good. Umm I mean… my goldfish felt good after eating. Heh heh.”
5. They Start Taking Care Of Their Appearance Abnormally
They randomly start dieting for no reason. She’s putting on more makeup. He’s going to the gym more often.
If it’s for health or a legit reason, they should be open about it.
But if you ask them and they just be like “Oh, no reason lo.”
If your boyfriend/girlfriend is the type to wear a T-shirt and shorts to Orchard Road, but yet one day they’re dressed to the nines just to “meet a friend” or “go do project”, then…
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6. Things They Say Don’t Add Up
I mean, that’s usually how cheaters get caught.
The two of you go on a date to 49seats and he/she says: “Wah, never come here before.”
But you distinctly remember them claiming to have come here with their grandma one month ago.
And then you ask them about it, and they’re like “Walao, I forget cannot meh! Why you so paranoid?! Crazy f*** sia you!”
But all you asked was “Oh I thought you came here last month with your grandma?”
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And that’s the last sign.
7. They’re Overly Defensive Over Questions
If a simple question like “What you eat for lunch?” can trigger them, they’re probably hiding something.
Also, they might not want to disclose details about their day.
“Dear, how was your day?”
“Usual lo, work.”
“Oh… what else leh?”
“EH NABEH YOU ASK SO MUCH FOR WHAT YOU PARANOID CRAZY *********”
Yep, huge red flag.
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Also, to reward you for reading all the way, here’s a bonus one for you.
You’re Reading This Article
Okay, maybe you’re just reading this for fun.
But if you’re actually reading to determine if your partner is cheating, chances are that you know deep down that they’re hiding something.
In that case, just confront them gently. Ask them to work through this together if they claim they’re not.
But here’s a word of warning:
A lot of the signs in the article may just mean that they’re hiding something. It doesn’t necessarily mean they’re cheating.
Maybe he’s planning to propose to you. Maybe she’s giving you a pregnancy surprise.
It could be something good. Have a little trust and faith.
But if you find it hard to trust your partner, then you already have your answer right there.